Reflection 8. – Freedom to make decisions and opinion’s

chessboard game

The best way to put your belief in children , give them an understanding of all possibilities , choices , the effects good or bad , the values right and wrong and then freedom to let them make their decisions and form opinions based on their thinking and experience. Yet if they go wrong they will learn and if it goes right it will be their own decision.

In some family systems children have no say to decision related to them choices on education , hobbies, interests , art, preferences for sport, even basic decisions like choosing clothes, toys, friends, daily items are controlled or standardized or worst chosen by parents themselves.

This hampers the ability to go through this process of decision making , work on their problems and evaluate their choices for pros and cons and learn from their experience. The decision process involves – identify the problem , gather information about the issue from self from other similar sources or people , work on solutions and evaluate their pros and cons, make a decision to implement a choice and be ready to accept the failure if it occurs and learn from them.

In the long run if decisions are imposed on the child it effects the Childs emotions but also he doesn’t get to much work on to know about himself , what he likes or not, what works best for him, what are his values , why shouldn’t he make a choice if not. All this comes from only practically making decisions in daily life , remote controlling or imposing decisions or over protecting them from making wrong choices has its drawbacks which hampers the child decision making skills and overall development.

Many a times situation or discussions in a family require the input of members to form a collective decision to benefit of all. But opinions of children are considered insignificant or never mater or even asked for. Its important to explain the situation or scenario , talk to them comfort them and ask for their opinions too. Opinions help to understand about the Childs view , mindset and preparation or readiness about the current scenario. Also helps the parents in making decision understanding the Childs perspective and helping through the process of change that may come and take necessary steps to ease the child. The childs feeling need to be heard and emotional well being are taken care of if his opinions are valued. This helps in building strong bonds within the family especially in times that brings them closer.

Following a strict parenting or controlling their decisions and opinions impacts the childs ability later to become a confident decision maker and having well formed opinions .Decision making gives the experience to learn from their mistakes which is very much necessary for the growth.

Many a times milestone decisions related to individual, education , family life , career are very much influenced by others and controlled this leads to circle of events that leads to disappointments or failures .It starts first by not having the freedom to take decisions , then he submits to decision and deals the situation as they arise, in the process looses the ability to make decisions as he is following and trying to work out a decision taken by another, thus the chances of failure increase as he lacks the ability or control to deal with situations and it turns out to be that it was never his decision .This effects all the people involved as a part or result of the decision.

The power to make decisions and to form opinions gives freedom not to self but to every other family member of the individual to be able to make their own decisions .Decision making skills are important part of successful life at home and at work which needs to developed with experience.

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